My 30th birthday is approaching and I can honestly say to you, and to myself, that I am super excited.
I am happy with where I am in my life and the woman that I am becoming.
And you know what? It feels really damn good to be able to say that!
If you asked me how I felt about 30 a year ago, hell, even a few months ago, you would have gotten a scrunched up face and an “eh” type of answer. Possibly between a few tears too depending on the day.
It’s no secret that this is definitely not what I thought 30 would look like.
So, what changed?
I took a lot of time to analyze the scenario of what I thought 30 meant. The husband, the kids, the career, the house and so on…
When I pictured myself in this setting, it was just blurry. I couldn’t see myself there anymore. That life that I envisioned for so long was no longer a part of me.
My mind and the person I am have evolved so drastically over this past decade but somehow that fairytale dream never evolved with me.
Now that I’m turning 30, I am picturing a new fairytale.
It doesn’t come with prince charming on a white horse, it doesn’t come with a six-figure high-power career, and it’s not a 10 year, hell it’s not even a 5 year, plan.
It’s actually quite simple.
My fairytale is to wake up every single day with the same adventurous spirit that got me to this point.
To be able to say that I am happy with where I am in my life, what I’m doing, and the person that I am.
If I can do that every day for the rest of my life than my life is completely full.
But how have I achieved that and how will I continue to?
By remembering that this beautiful adventure that I’m on is my life and I’m lucky enough to wake up to it every single day.
It was not handed to me, nor was it bought for me.
I dreamed it, I worked for it, and I earned it.
I created this.
Each day I remind myself of this.
I spent some time reflecting on all the things I’ve taken away from this past decade.
So, without sounding too basic, I’ll share with you what I’ve learned through it all.
Here are 30 things I learned in 30 years…
(probably most of them all within the past year but hey, better late than never!)
- A healthy lifestyle is the best gift you can give to your future self!
- Build a routine. And then be okay when that routine doesn’t go as planned every time.
- Be kind to yourself; physically, mentally, and emotionally.
- Sleep and coconut water really do cure all!
- The relationship you have with yourself is the most important so make it a good one!
- Get to know yourself. If that means living solo for a year in your own city or moving to China for an unknown amount of time, do whatever it takes. The growth and independence that comes with this will help you get through many things in your future.
- Stop comparing yourself to others.
- Be yourself. It’s never too late to be whoever you want to be and do whatever you want to do.
- Try new things and explore your hobbies. Don’t let what you’re supposed to do or who you’re supposed to be, measure this.
- Learn something from everything you experience and everyone you meet.
- Take others opinions, judgments, criticism, and hate about you with an itsy bitsy tiny grain of salt.
- Embrace your weaknesses but don’t dwell on them.
- Don’t let anyone talk to you or treat you in a manner that is disrespectful under any circumstance; friend, lover, family, or colleague.
- Relationships of any sort take work.
- Build adult relationships with your parents, grandparents, relatives etc. Every family dynamic is different, so figure out what this means to you and how it works for your family.
- Surround yourself with the type of people you need in your life. Anyone who doesn’t fit that doesn’t deserve to be there.
- Each relationship you have is different. Trying to have the same relationship with different people is stressful. Once you accept that each one brings something different to your life and you understand the framework of that relationship you will be a lot more content.
- The best of friends are the ones that you can pick back up with after any amount of time has passed and it’s like nothing’s changed; don’t let those ones go!
- Ask questions and learn about your culture, family, heritage, and embrace the traditions while your loved ones are still around to share them.
- Know when it’s time to let go of people and things. When you hold on you leave no room for growth and new opportunities.
- If you have something to say, say it but think before you speak. You cannot take your words back.
- It’s okay to say no. You literally don’t have to do anything that you don’t want to.
- Let go of the FOMO (fear of missing out)!
- A genuine act of kindness goes a long way. Smiles are the best gift you can give!
- Don’t be afraid to share your feelings. In turn, learn to be receptive and respectful of others feelings even if you do not agree with them.
- You can do anything, anything, you put your mind to. It’s not about money or luck it’s about motivation and determination.
- Take pictures!!!! Of people you love and places you go. Share your stories with your parents, children, and friends. Pass on your legacy.
- Stop caring so much what other people think about you. There will always be someone who doesn’t like you but there are 5 others who do and they absolutely adore you. Concentrate on the positive, not the negative!
- Find the mentality that no matter what hardships, lost friendships, broken hearts, or tragedies you come across in your life that you are strong enough on your own to get through them.
- I’m not perfect. I will continue to make mistakes. I’ll keep people around past their expiration date and I’ll hurt more than I should. I’ll eat the cake.. and the ice cream too. I will definitely get lost and then found and then lost again. I won’t save as much money as I should and I’ll never get enough sleep, but you know what I’ve learned? It’s okay! It’s actually more than okay and it’s what makes each day an adventure!
Remembering these things keeps me balanced and focused on the life that I want to live.
Now, I feel more ready than ever to conquer this next decade!